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Character Formation
Titus 2:1-15 14 September, 2008
“Character Formation”
I hate to sound like I am launching into a continual diatribe against
our contemporary western secular culture, but it is the culture in
which we live and move from Monday through Saturday; and if we are
not very thoughtful about it, it can color the way we hear the word of
God. In other words, rather than having our minds renewed and
transformed by the Word and will of God, even well-meaning Christian
people can begin to parrot the philosophies and harbor the mindset of
an increasingly post-Christian culture. For example, when we read
verses 4 and 5 in chapter 2 of Paul’s letter to Titus, we may have
found ourselves feeling somewhat uncomfortable. When he writes
that older women should “train the younger women to love their
husbands and children, to be self-controlled and pure, to be busy at
home, to be kind, and to be subject to their husbands”, it may have
set off four-alarm-fire-bells of protest in our minds, because we have
been indoctrinated, trained in way we should think and speak about
women, in a culture that has zero tolerance for alternative viewpoints.
So as we heard the Holy Scriptures being read, we may have found
2
ourselves interjecting all the objections of cultural censors on the
lookout for any breaches of political correctness. We may have heard
an inner voice saying, “Yes, but women don’t have to be married.
Yes, but women don’t have to have children. Self-controlled and
pure? Why that sounds like repression and sexual frigidity to me.
Busy at home and subject to their husbands? What does he want?
Barefoot and pregnant Stepford wives?” Now, maybe you didn’t think
any of those things. But if you did, it might suggest that, like me, you
have been conditioned not to violate or even question the strict rules
of politically correct thought and speech. No wonder we get nervous
or embarrassed by verses like the ones we’ve read today. I have
heard sincere Christian people make haste to distance themselves
from such verses by saying, “Well, that’s just Paul!” (As though
Paul’s letters aren’t a major part of the New Testament), or by
speaking as though it goes without saying that we are obviously more
enlightened then Paul and we hardly need to be bound by such
patriarchal and chauvinistic assumptions. You see, it is true that we
need to explore exactly what Paul was saying and make sure we don’t
misinterpret it by reading it through the wrong lens. But the point I
am trying to make is that we are so steeped in western secular
3
cultural assumptions, that we could reject or dismiss large portions of
the Word of God because they don’t fit into the web of assumptions
we have been trained to accept without thinking. And if that is the
way we find ourselves responding to the Word of God then we have to
reckon with the fact that we are giving our culture the authority to
correct the Scriptures, rather than acknowledging God’s authority to
correct our culture. This, I think, has been the struggle-point of the
modern mainline churches. Do we tell God what we think and let that
shape our theological directions? Or do we take our directions from
the Word of God and let Him shape the people we are becoming and
the church we must be? All of us must think about the assumptions
we bring into this room. Where does truth come from? Does it come
from my inner feelings, or from the Word of God? Am I here to
negotiate with God on behalf of my culture, or am I here as a citizen of
the Kingdom over which Jesus is sovereign, and therefore I have
come to receive my marching orders, and to be trained in his
unimpeachable way? We can’t have it both ways. As Eric Liddell’s
father said in the film “Chariots of Fire”, “The Kingdom of God is not
a democracy. There is no discussion, no deliberation, no referenda
as to which way to go, which road to take. There is no low road, only
4
the high… one right, one wrong, one voice, one absolute ruler… one
benevolent despot, demanding to be obeyed…” Folks, what
assumptions do we bring into this room? If I assume that my inner
feelings are the final arbiters or judges of what I must or will do, then I
could sit here for a thousand Sundays in a row, and never once have
the Word of God make a dent in my chosen ways of life. It would all
be like water off a duck’s back. But if I come in these doors as one
who acknowledges that Jesus is my Lord, that his Name is above
every other name, and that his Word trumps every other word, then I
must yield to his will and Word and way – or I am a liar, and I am
playing a kind of game in which I pretend to belong to God, but
maintain an allegiance entirely to my own will. What do you assume
to be true when you walk in the doors of this room? If we don’t stop
and figure that out, this could be an elaborate exercise in selfdeception;
wanting to convince ourselves that we are into this Godthing,
when we may never in fact have shifted our allegiance to
anyone but ourselves. If we have never really decided who we are
here for, we are liable to start drifting away when we discover one
Sunday that “I didn’t get anything out of it.” Isn’t worship something
we are supposed to give, without any strings attached? Are we here
5
for our own good pleasure? Or have we come hungry to hear from
God, anxious to be trained, and ready to practice what we’ve learned
as a way of life? I think that is what we are here for. So let’s set aside
our cultural biases, and listen responsively to God’s remarkable
alternative; because I am convinced that God is addressing every
person in this room.
First of all (gulp!) he is talking to preachers like me, and every Sunday
school teacher, and youth leaders, and parents, and grandparents –
to anyone who has an opportunity to teach a child the truth about
God, “You must”, Paul says, “teach what is in accord with sound
doctrine.” The word here is that when someone is counting on us to
tell them the truth, the truth is what they should hear from us; not
someone’s exciting new theory, not an opinion from the last
columnist we read, and not ever our own skewed philosophy. If they
come to us for truth we must tell them that the truth comes from the
one who is the way, the truth, and the life. We point them to Jesus
and the word of God written that literally tells us everything we need
to know for our life and for our salvation. If we do less than that, or if
we convince them that the Word of God is just one of many optional
6
and equal truths that can be selected from the salad bar of
possibilities, then we will have betrayed their trust. No one has to
accept the truth of the Word of God. But woe to the preacher who
reneges on his or her responsibility to teach what is in accord with
sound doctrine. “You must”, Paul says. This is imperative that
disallows any other option. If preachers took this seriously, our
churches might not be any bigger, but it would be a lot more difficult
to find people in the pews who can’t distinguish between sound and
bogus doctrine.
Now, what does he say to each group represented here this morning?
He tells Titus to, “Teach the Older men to be temperate, worthy of
respect, self-controlled, and sound in faith, in love and in endurance.”
What is he talking about here? He is talking about the church as a
primary place for character formation. Notice he is not talking about
some select handful of older men. He is not, in this place, talking
about the qualities or characteristics of those whom we would ordain
as Elders. He is talking about every older man in the church. Every
older man in the church should understand his responsibility to be a
moral and spiritual example to the young people and new Christians
7
in this church. Notice that there aren’t any exceptions, no term limits,
and no one man who can claim to be retired from this responsibility.
And what kind of character do Christian young people need to see in
the older men of this church? They need to see seasoned soldiers of
Christ whose conduct of life is both responsible and sensible. Young
men want to be able to respect the older men in this church. I really
believe that. But if they see men my age and older throwing their own
“grown-up” versions of temper-tantrums, pouting and grousing,
ready to complain but unwilling to help, spouting goofy ideas or
launching into angry tirades against anyone who disagrees with them,
apparently not that interested in worship or the things of God, it
creates what psychologists call “cognitive dissonance”. And that
means that what they see doesn’t match-up with what they know
should be true. If we don’t behave with dignity, maturity, wisdom and
love, they see a bunch of white-haired old guys acting like children.
And our young men desperately need to see older men they can
respect. They need to be able to look at us older guys and say, “Now
that’s the kind of man I want to grow up to be.” Some of them don’t
have fathers at home, and I am happy to say that I could point them to
any number of men here, and say, “Now that is what Christian
8
manhood looks like. There is maturity in Christ.” But it doesn’t
happen over-night, and it is never accidental. Men, the kind of
Christian you are in your maturity matters more than you will ever
know. There are young men and boys here hoping to see in you a
model of Christian manhood worthy of respect. If they see it, I am
convinced they will never forget it.
And to the older women in the church Paul says your responsibility is
every bit as serious as the men’s. He tells Titus, “Teach the older
women to be reverent in the way they live, not to be slanderers or
addicted to much wine, but to teach what is good. Then they can train
the younger women to love their husbands and children, to be selfcontrolled
and pure, to be busy at home, to be kind, and to be subject
to their husbands, so that no one will malign the word of God.” Let
me say a word about the historical situation here. The truth is that
women in the early church found an incredible new freedom and
equality is Christ. So much so that some women took freedom to
mean license. They abandoned their responsibilities, you could not
find some of them at home, and some just took over, constantly
disrupting the good order of church gatherings. So Paul was, in
9
effect, trying to temper some of the zeal that was leading to church
and family chaos. He was, I think, trying to say that a mature
women’s wonderful new status in Christ didn’t mean they were free to
deep six all the norms of social decorum and family stability. And if
they wanted the watching world to take Christianity seriously, it was
important for the older women to demonstrate the wisdom that comes
from maturity and the discipline of self-control, so that families could
continue to be the first place of Christian education and a credible
arena in which young women would see modesty and supportive love
lived-out. And if our young women don’t see those examples of
mature Christian discipleship in the adult women of this church, you
can bet they won’t find it in our secular culture. If you don’t provide
the model, where do they have to look? Anyone can choose to
abandon the faith but I would be loath to think that they would do so
because they couldn’t find credible examples at their church. And
again, I will be quick to say that there are many good examples here,
but it is a duty from which our women must never shirk.
Paul goes on, “Similarly, encourage the young men to be selfcontrolled.
In everything set them an example by doing what is good.
10
In your teaching show integrity, seriousness and soundness of
speech that cannot be condemned, so that those who oppose you
may be ashamed because they have nothing bad to say about us.”
Folks, I happen to believe that young people growing up in this
superficial, sex-saturated, sophomoric culture of ours are starving for
credible examples of maturity, wisdom, and spiritual depth. The
culture doesn’t have it for them. And what Paul is asking us, is, do
we? Have we got what they need to grow up into the measure of the
stature of the fullness of Christ? You see, I get the feeling that when
push comes to shove, what really counts, - - for now and for the
future - - is what kind of person Christ is making of you. If knowing
Christ really causes you to grow in grace, if knowing Christ really
makes you more humane, if knowing Christ really makes you a
deeper, wiser, warmer, kinder, a more humorous, balanced, humble,
playful, compassionate human being; in short, if knowing Christ
causes you, step by step to become more like Christ, then you will
make an impression so indelible that your children will never forget it.
That’s what we need in the church. I think if Paul would have had
access to all the leadership-training manuals marketed in the last
11
thirty years, he would have sold them cheap at a garage sale. We
don’t’ need trendy new techniques or the proven formulas of Fortune
500 companies. What we need is intentional Christian character
formation. What we need are leaders and models, (in Eugene
Petersons’ words) “men and women who know how to treat people in
their congregations in order to bring them to maturity in Christ.” We
don’t have to be “gifted”, extraordinary Christians: we need ordinary
Christians who will use their gifts to build up the body of Christ. What
we need desperately is a depth of character; characters formed by a
lifelong and ever-growing maturity in Christ. Who would have
guessed that maybe our greatest gift to the next generation of the
church would be for us to grow-up – to get mature in Christ? I tell
you what; real maturity is in short supply in this world. Spiritual
adulthood has almost disappeared. If you want to be exceptional and
effective, be temperate, worthy of respect, self-controlled and sound
in faith, in love and in endurance. Amen? Amen.
“Character Formation”
I hate to sound like I am launching into a continual diatribe against
our contemporary western secular culture, but it is the culture in
which we live and move from Monday through Saturday; and if we are
not very thoughtful about it, it can color the way we hear the word of
God. In other words, rather than having our minds renewed and
transformed by the Word and will of God, even well-meaning Christian
people can begin to parrot the philosophies and harbor the mindset of
an increasingly post-Christian culture. For example, when we read
verses 4 and 5 in chapter 2 of Paul’s letter to Titus, we may have
found ourselves feeling somewhat uncomfortable. When he writes
that older women should “train the younger women to love their
husbands and children, to be self-controlled and pure, to be busy at
home, to be kind, and to be subject to their husbands”, it may have
set off four-alarm-fire-bells of protest in our minds, because we have
been indoctrinated, trained in way we should think and speak about
women, in a culture that has zero tolerance for alternative viewpoints.
So as we heard the Holy Scriptures being read, we may have found
2
ourselves interjecting all the objections of cultural censors on the
lookout for any breaches of political correctness. We may have heard
an inner voice saying, “Yes, but women don’t have to be married.
Yes, but women don’t have to have children. Self-controlled and
pure? Why that sounds like repression and sexual frigidity to me.
Busy at home and subject to their husbands? What does he want?
Barefoot and pregnant Stepford wives?” Now, maybe you didn’t think
any of those things. But if you did, it might suggest that, like me, you
have been conditioned not to violate or even question the strict rules
of politically correct thought and speech. No wonder we get nervous
or embarrassed by verses like the ones we’ve read today. I have
heard sincere Christian people make haste to distance themselves
from such verses by saying, “Well, that’s just Paul!” (As though
Paul’s letters aren’t a major part of the New Testament), or by
speaking as though it goes without saying that we are obviously more
enlightened then Paul and we hardly need to be bound by such
patriarchal and chauvinistic assumptions. You see, it is true that we
need to explore exactly what Paul was saying and make sure we don’t
misinterpret it by reading it through the wrong lens. But the point I
am trying to make is that we are so steeped in western secular
3
cultural assumptions, that we could reject or dismiss large portions of
the Word of God because they don’t fit into the web of assumptions
we have been trained to accept without thinking. And if that is the
way we find ourselves responding to the Word of God then we have to
reckon with the fact that we are giving our culture the authority to
correct the Scriptures, rather than acknowledging God’s authority to
correct our culture. This, I think, has been the struggle-point of the
modern mainline churches. Do we tell God what we think and let that
shape our theological directions? Or do we take our directions from
the Word of God and let Him shape the people we are becoming and
the church we must be? All of us must think about the assumptions
we bring into this room. Where does truth come from? Does it come
from my inner feelings, or from the Word of God? Am I here to
negotiate with God on behalf of my culture, or am I here as a citizen of
the Kingdom over which Jesus is sovereign, and therefore I have
come to receive my marching orders, and to be trained in his
unimpeachable way? We can’t have it both ways. As Eric Liddell’s
father said in the film “Chariots of Fire”, “The Kingdom of God is not
a democracy. There is no discussion, no deliberation, no referenda
as to which way to go, which road to take. There is no low road, only
4
the high… one right, one wrong, one voice, one absolute ruler… one
benevolent despot, demanding to be obeyed…” Folks, what
assumptions do we bring into this room? If I assume that my inner
feelings are the final arbiters or judges of what I must or will do, then I
could sit here for a thousand Sundays in a row, and never once have
the Word of God make a dent in my chosen ways of life. It would all
be like water off a duck’s back. But if I come in these doors as one
who acknowledges that Jesus is my Lord, that his Name is above
every other name, and that his Word trumps every other word, then I
must yield to his will and Word and way – or I am a liar, and I am
playing a kind of game in which I pretend to belong to God, but
maintain an allegiance entirely to my own will. What do you assume
to be true when you walk in the doors of this room? If we don’t stop
and figure that out, this could be an elaborate exercise in selfdeception;
wanting to convince ourselves that we are into this Godthing,
when we may never in fact have shifted our allegiance to
anyone but ourselves. If we have never really decided who we are
here for, we are liable to start drifting away when we discover one
Sunday that “I didn’t get anything out of it.” Isn’t worship something
we are supposed to give, without any strings attached? Are we here
5
for our own good pleasure? Or have we come hungry to hear from
God, anxious to be trained, and ready to practice what we’ve learned
as a way of life? I think that is what we are here for. So let’s set aside
our cultural biases, and listen responsively to God’s remarkable
alternative; because I am convinced that God is addressing every
person in this room.
First of all (gulp!) he is talking to preachers like me, and every Sunday
school teacher, and youth leaders, and parents, and grandparents –
to anyone who has an opportunity to teach a child the truth about
God, “You must”, Paul says, “teach what is in accord with sound
doctrine.” The word here is that when someone is counting on us to
tell them the truth, the truth is what they should hear from us; not
someone’s exciting new theory, not an opinion from the last
columnist we read, and not ever our own skewed philosophy. If they
come to us for truth we must tell them that the truth comes from the
one who is the way, the truth, and the life. We point them to Jesus
and the word of God written that literally tells us everything we need
to know for our life and for our salvation. If we do less than that, or if
we convince them that the Word of God is just one of many optional
6
and equal truths that can be selected from the salad bar of
possibilities, then we will have betrayed their trust. No one has to
accept the truth of the Word of God. But woe to the preacher who
reneges on his or her responsibility to teach what is in accord with
sound doctrine. “You must”, Paul says. This is imperative that
disallows any other option. If preachers took this seriously, our
churches might not be any bigger, but it would be a lot more difficult
to find people in the pews who can’t distinguish between sound and
bogus doctrine.
Now, what does he say to each group represented here this morning?
He tells Titus to, “Teach the Older men to be temperate, worthy of
respect, self-controlled, and sound in faith, in love and in endurance.”
What is he talking about here? He is talking about the church as a
primary place for character formation. Notice he is not talking about
some select handful of older men. He is not, in this place, talking
about the qualities or characteristics of those whom we would ordain
as Elders. He is talking about every older man in the church. Every
older man in the church should understand his responsibility to be a
moral and spiritual example to the young people and new Christians
7
in this church. Notice that there aren’t any exceptions, no term limits,
and no one man who can claim to be retired from this responsibility.
And what kind of character do Christian young people need to see in
the older men of this church? They need to see seasoned soldiers of
Christ whose conduct of life is both responsible and sensible. Young
men want to be able to respect the older men in this church. I really
believe that. But if they see men my age and older throwing their own
“grown-up” versions of temper-tantrums, pouting and grousing,
ready to complain but unwilling to help, spouting goofy ideas or
launching into angry tirades against anyone who disagrees with them,
apparently not that interested in worship or the things of God, it
creates what psychologists call “cognitive dissonance”. And that
means that what they see doesn’t match-up with what they know
should be true. If we don’t behave with dignity, maturity, wisdom and
love, they see a bunch of white-haired old guys acting like children.
And our young men desperately need to see older men they can
respect. They need to be able to look at us older guys and say, “Now
that’s the kind of man I want to grow up to be.” Some of them don’t
have fathers at home, and I am happy to say that I could point them to
any number of men here, and say, “Now that is what Christian
8
manhood looks like. There is maturity in Christ.” But it doesn’t
happen over-night, and it is never accidental. Men, the kind of
Christian you are in your maturity matters more than you will ever
know. There are young men and boys here hoping to see in you a
model of Christian manhood worthy of respect. If they see it, I am
convinced they will never forget it.
And to the older women in the church Paul says your responsibility is
every bit as serious as the men’s. He tells Titus, “Teach the older
women to be reverent in the way they live, not to be slanderers or
addicted to much wine, but to teach what is good. Then they can train
the younger women to love their husbands and children, to be selfcontrolled
and pure, to be busy at home, to be kind, and to be subject
to their husbands, so that no one will malign the word of God.” Let
me say a word about the historical situation here. The truth is that
women in the early church found an incredible new freedom and
equality is Christ. So much so that some women took freedom to
mean license. They abandoned their responsibilities, you could not
find some of them at home, and some just took over, constantly
disrupting the good order of church gatherings. So Paul was, in
9
effect, trying to temper some of the zeal that was leading to church
and family chaos. He was, I think, trying to say that a mature
women’s wonderful new status in Christ didn’t mean they were free to
deep six all the norms of social decorum and family stability. And if
they wanted the watching world to take Christianity seriously, it was
important for the older women to demonstrate the wisdom that comes
from maturity and the discipline of self-control, so that families could
continue to be the first place of Christian education and a credible
arena in which young women would see modesty and supportive love
lived-out. And if our young women don’t see those examples of
mature Christian discipleship in the adult women of this church, you
can bet they won’t find it in our secular culture. If you don’t provide
the model, where do they have to look? Anyone can choose to
abandon the faith but I would be loath to think that they would do so
because they couldn’t find credible examples at their church. And
again, I will be quick to say that there are many good examples here,
but it is a duty from which our women must never shirk.
Paul goes on, “Similarly, encourage the young men to be selfcontrolled.
In everything set them an example by doing what is good.
10
In your teaching show integrity, seriousness and soundness of
speech that cannot be condemned, so that those who oppose you
may be ashamed because they have nothing bad to say about us.”
Folks, I happen to believe that young people growing up in this
superficial, sex-saturated, sophomoric culture of ours are starving for
credible examples of maturity, wisdom, and spiritual depth. The
culture doesn’t have it for them. And what Paul is asking us, is, do
we? Have we got what they need to grow up into the measure of the
stature of the fullness of Christ? You see, I get the feeling that when
push comes to shove, what really counts, - - for now and for the
future - - is what kind of person Christ is making of you. If knowing
Christ really causes you to grow in grace, if knowing Christ really
makes you more humane, if knowing Christ really makes you a
deeper, wiser, warmer, kinder, a more humorous, balanced, humble,
playful, compassionate human being; in short, if knowing Christ
causes you, step by step to become more like Christ, then you will
make an impression so indelible that your children will never forget it.
That’s what we need in the church. I think if Paul would have had
access to all the leadership-training manuals marketed in the last
11
thirty years, he would have sold them cheap at a garage sale. We
don’t’ need trendy new techniques or the proven formulas of Fortune
500 companies. What we need is intentional Christian character
formation. What we need are leaders and models, (in Eugene
Petersons’ words) “men and women who know how to treat people in
their congregations in order to bring them to maturity in Christ.” We
don’t have to be “gifted”, extraordinary Christians: we need ordinary
Christians who will use their gifts to build up the body of Christ. What
we need desperately is a depth of character; characters formed by a
lifelong and ever-growing maturity in Christ. Who would have
guessed that maybe our greatest gift to the next generation of the
church would be for us to grow-up – to get mature in Christ? I tell
you what; real maturity is in short supply in this world. Spiritual
adulthood has almost disappeared. If you want to be exceptional and
effective, be temperate, worthy of respect, self-controlled and sound
in faith, in love and in endurance. Amen? Amen.
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Last Updated ( Sunday, 14 June 2009 19:06 )
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